In the spirit of living in the Midwest and being buried in snow and subzero temperatures for almost a week now, I decided that I should embrace the fact that my two favorite things can coincide with one another-cheesy, 80's slasher flicks and Old Man Winter. My favorite season of the year actually is winter because I like the solitude that freezing in your living room or basement can bring as well as the fact that indulging in being an introvert coupled with the ideal that it's just more difficult during this time of year for other folks to want to go out in lieu of chilling their asses off brings me a simpler joy that no one will bother me to want to hang out. It's less anyway. I'm way more comfortable not spending my time with others and would much rather ensconce myself in the silent beauty known as isolation. There are many benefits to having a personality and mentality like this, and I'm really grateful the universe has blessed me with such a humble existence. However, for a film like Iced from 1989, none of the characters here have a chance at participating in such a foray. This film has been on my "T.W.E." list (To Watch Eventually) ever since Cecil from GoodBadFlicks did a review of it multiple years ago as well as Ben from 80's Horror Central. They both said solid things about it and it just seemed like it had that specific, shitty 80's charm that I'm always looking for when the mood strikes me to sit through an entry like this. If you're already a fan of the Friday The 13th franchise or any deeper cuts in the slasher sea, then you're going to outright enjoy Iced purely for the energy it brings and the similarly styled kills it formulates. The plot here and the way it unfolds really does have a layer of snooze to it unfortunately-and I know this outright because I'm normally pretty good at remembering all the characters names and their purposes in whatever is going on is-but here in Iced for some reason, I had a really tough time recalling who was who and what the hell they were doing there. Mainly what gravity pulls together here in Iced is that we start with a group of friends who are really into skiing are on a trip together, there's a main character named Jeff that has some kind of mental issues that lead him in becoming jealous of his friend Cory getting naked with his other friend Trina. I guess he wanted to get with her, so they slalom/race down a mountain against one another to win her heart, he loses to Cory, gets pissed, and plans to stroll down the hallway at the hotel they were staying at to murder Cory and presumably Trina with one of his ski poles. He's interrupted by Eddie (who kind of looks like if Robert Goulet, Geraldo Rivera and Dabney Coleman had a threesome) which pisses him off even more. So he goes to ski on the slopes by himself after all the trails are shut down for the night and ends up killing himself by careening off of a snow bank and landing chest first onto a huge pile of rocks. Four years later, everyone who is leftover from this initial trip has been invited to check out some new condo establishment where they all cost $250,000 (in 80's money that's insanity) and a lot of pointless drama and bad acting build up to the point where maybe all of these characters should bite it. There are a couple of twists towards the end that I won't spoil just in case if you do want to sit through Iced, but basically who you think is Jeff making a comeback and killing everyone in this snow covered establishment really isn't. Maybe you'll be shocked by that reveal, and maybe you won't. Oh, there's something else I need to point out here-Lisa Loring who played the original Wednesday in The Adams Family is here as Jeanette, and she couldn't be more hot. She also played a raging psycho/lesbian bitch in another crappy 80's horror flick titled Blood Frenzy. I did a Youtube video about that movie-maybe I should revisit it and write a new review on here for it. Anyways, so there's that as well. I'm going to notarize this here for you zits and zombies and just state that if you're already into these kinds of funny, overacted slasher pieces from the 80's, you really can't go wrong with some fresh powder from the likes of Iced. If you're not and you're just trolling around looking for a horror movie to watch, you had better be prepared. There's someone hiding inside that snowman over there.