31 Horrors of October: The Fly

What a behemoth of a film to end October with. Especially on Halloween night. This, zits and zombies, is how a re-make is done. You take the idea from the original, you twist it into something a little bit different, and amp everything up to eleven. Seth Brundle has been conducting experiments on teleportation. He's so close, he can almost taste it. Seth makes a believer out of Veronica after a science collaboration party when she comes with him to his lab to get her story for The Particle. Trash mag. He teleports her stocking with no glitches, but he needs more. He wants to be able to teleport living organisms-human beings. Animals. They have sex, eat breakfast, and conduct an experiment on a baboon. It gets turned inside out. But Brundle's got it. He knows what to do. After his success, he tries to teleport himself-and a fly gets in the way. If you don't know what happens after that, you really, really need to watch The Fly. It's a roller coaster that you won't be able to get off of until it's over. And it's such a messed up and sad ending that you'll probably want to watch the sequel right afterwards. It's pretty gross that flies puke on their food before they eat it. That will stick with you for awhile.  

31 Horrors of October: Rocktober Blood

As far as heavy metal horror goes, I'm always excited to watch one that I haven't seen yet. Unfortunately, my smile ran dry on this one. I know, I know. I'm going to get stabbed for this. Rocktober Blood has it's core fans, and that's fine. Every horror and cult film does, no matter how mud covered and briny the film is. But, there was just something missing from the over all package of Rocktober Blood. I really don't know what it is either. I want to love it, but I just can't. I felt like the kills were lazy, the story was kind of meh and there were just to many lens flares. My God. I don't really know if that was on purpose or not, but it was a little to much for my taste. I want the cinematography to be clean-not like I'm looking into the sun every other scene. The music in here is excellent, however, and if I ever run across the soundtrack, I'll probably buy it. If you're interested at all in metal horror, start with Trick or Treat or Black Roses. So Billy doesn't come back. 

31 Horrors of October: Children of the Corn IV (blu-ray)

Watching Children of the Corn IV was a little different this time. My fellow garbage collector Steve Carpenter watched it with me (we a few hours prior went to Buffalo Wild Wings, with my wife for food and the Cubs game) after we came back to the house. I think it was actually more enjoyable with a second person because this one is just kind of there. It's part of the series, but it just mills around waiting for a curious fan to watch it as it sobs in the corner. Because I think it's mostly ignored. As expected, once you delve past the third entry, no one cares. And I think that's what happened here. No one cared. The one scene we both laughed at and questioned was when one of the doctors at the hospital gets cut in half with a blade sticking out of the front of a hospital bed. One of the possessed kids attaches a blade to the front of a hospital bed, rides it down the hallway, and chops the dude in half. Brilliant. What's not brilliant is just how this movie trudges. The pace gets slow at times and you kind of just want it to end. But even great franchises like Children of the Corn can't be fully cooked all the way. Should've kept it in longer. That's what she said. 

31 Horrors of October: Scream 2 (blu-ray)

For what it's worth, I have always thought that Scream 2 was the best out of the four. I really don't know why. They're all great, but for some reason I can go back and watch the second movie in this franchise over and over again and it just never gets old. I also dig the homages that Wes Craven slid in here for a couple of the character's names as well- "Cotton" and "Loomis"... Hellraiser and Halloween anyone? Well, if you don't catch these right away, you need to brush up on your shit. Time is running out and October is almost over for this year. Don't disappoint me. Honestly, my favorite bit in Scream 2 is the opening scene where the Rialto is packed with people to see the horror flick affectionately titled "Stab" which is based on a book that was written about the events that happened in the first Scream film. Clever. Watching a bunch of dumb teens in the Ghostface costume running around like idiots pretending to stab each other is just fun and silly. And you know it could only get better from there. Jada Pinkett gets what she deserves. Just saying.   

31 Horrors of October: Pet Sematary (blu-ray)

Once you're dead, that's it. Sometimes dead is better. Or more like, once something is dead, leave it alone. I really don't think that any pet or relative would really love the idea of coming back from the dead once their gone, especially being dug up and re-buried again in a different spot to be resurrected. That's just to much damn work in my opinion. Stephen King is always a master at story telling, and Pet Sematary is no different. He even plays the priest at the funeral in the movie after Gage passes on. I just need to read the book now to compare because that's what I do. I'm sure it's just as good, if not better because, well, in a book, you can stamp as much detail as you want with no limit. Watch out for those shiny eyes in the dark-Church is watching.    

31 Horrors of October: Cannibal Campout

In my early years of starting this horror quest, I remember one of the first things I looked up on Youtube to try to start compounding a list of movies to buy was "gory horror movie trailers". Or something like that. The first trailer I watched was for a movie called Cannibal Campout, and it looked wicked. Like it was made for me. Calling my name. Straight up killing, gore, and gut-munching. There are however, no zombies. Just three really dumb brothers that live in a forest looking to kill campers that are passing through so they can have dinner. It does plod a lot in certain spots, and really the only "joy" I was able to cull from Cannibal Campout was when the main people were getting hacked up for barbecue. Sorry Mortician. I stole that from you. Gore and dismemberment aside, there are much better and entertaining SOV's out there compared to Cannibal Campout, but I could just say that this is a good first step to ween yourself into the genre if you so desire. It's a small world after all. If you don't get it, just watch the movie. 

31 Horrors of October: Motel Hell (blu-ray)

It says it right on the cover-"It takes all kinds of critters to make farmer Vincent's fritters." The one tag line that anyone that has ever seen this film ever remembers. And for good reason. For Farmer Vincent's fritters, it really does take all kinds of critters. Such as that weird ass garden comprised of people that he has crossed paths with and has decided to add to such proceedings to be curated and turned into meat for his jerky. And whatever else he sells as "fritters". This film really is an all out imitator of The Texas Chainsaw Massacre, but really, it's more of it's own thing. I've always been kind of thrown off by the scene where Vincent uses that hypnoist-ray-thing to keep the people in the garden subdued so they don't try to escape. He's got it all figured out-he even takes out their voice boxes so they can't talk or cry out for help. Ingenious. A true cult classic in pretty much every aspect of the word, Motel Hell is a cult horror classic that must be viewed at least once by even the most curious. The final scene with Vincent wearing a pig head and wielding a giant chainsaw is what this shit is all about. Sweet Onion Teriyaki, please.