Creep Van

A big part of being a horror film collector is taking chances. Chances on indie horror or "blind buys" is no easy task, and I've certainly had my fair share of wasting money on garbage that should have never been put into print in the first place. Such as horror anthology movies like Nightmare Alley or Visions of Horror are two very solid reasons not to commit blind buying too often. I, however, have had pretty good luck with blind buying and taking chances for the most part so far. I've even taken to watching movies on Netflix, Hulu or Amazon Prime before deciding if it's a film I want a physical copy of. Creep Van is an indie horror flick that I'm glad that I blind bought back around when I was about a year into this shit. At first, the title kind felt easy and generic (kind of like your mom) but I picked it up anyway for some reason as I gravitated towards the cover art. It just looks cool and the back cover only hands out minimal information about what is printed on the disc. That's how they all should be. Mystical. Let the bad times roll.

I smirked when I saw this kid had a blue ball.

Only bad people drive vans? What about soccer moms? They're annoying I guess.

Every guy has stolen porn magazines at some point.

"Elbow grease, city boy! Elbow grease!"

I don't think Deep Purple were ever bigger than Priest or Maiden.

   Detroit. What a dump.

So, you're not going to pick up you're chips?!

A booby trap in the drivers side of this guys van. What a creative bastard.

Lloyd Kaufman!

Jack-pot, get it? Ah, nevermind.

Bare breasts, I mean, what just happened?

Swami Ted is a dick. Just being real.

Chick flicks can be fun!

Yes they can, especially when you get your date to bang you while the movie is playing. Eh-hem. Let me fix my collar. Creep Van is a fantastic indie flick, especially since the initial time I viewed it after I purchased it, I wasn't into it. But that was before I really got into SOV horror, so that gave me a new appreciation for low budget filth and acting as stiff and rigid as Pinocchio's dick. I think I may have used that comparison before. Regardless, this is an indie you will want to add to you collection as it features boobies, a couple that has sex in some weird looking doghouse type thing in their backyard, Lucha Libre' outfits, Lloyd Kaufman, a chicks head getting smashed in the sliding door of the van and plenty of pointless, gory fun. That's the way, uh-huh, I like it.