Thursday, March 31, 2016

Witchboard


With modern, jump-scare, horror gutter-trash consistently being released in theaters these days just to make money, it's always the best option to go back and watch the good shit from the 80's. Witchboard is basically an 80's version of Ouija. And it's so much more entertaining. Tawny Kitaen plays main girl Linda in this spirit flick and it fully reminds me of why I have never messed with a Ouija board in the past, and I never will. That business is dangerous. I've heard many a story from people over the years that those things actually work and they have conjured up spirits that never should have been brought back. I even have an ex-girlfriend that tried to get me to do a Ouija board with her on a couple of occasions while we were dating. Of course, I wanted nothing to do with it. The world is cold enough as it is, let's not add to it. 

I love listening to people argue about whether God is real or not. Because he's not.

C'mon Jim, don't be a jackass.

I never realized that using a Ouija board had so many stupid rules.

"It's a lot stupid."   

The house is a mess. Clean it up.

Linda is a stone cold fox.

Is throwing a hatchet at someone at work considered horseplay? Or a soft error?

"You're a lazy scumbag." He sure is Jim.

Swooping Evil Dead camera angles.

 "Progressive entrapment?" Sounds like being a drug addict to me.

Mediums are phonies.

Zarabeth looks like Boy George.

Welcome to the house of seance'.

I felt like that it was necessary to throw in that Testament reference in there at the end. One of my favorite thrash metal bands from the 80's as well. So much 80's stuff with this film, isn't there? Now that I have this on dvd I need to hunt down the sequel. I know these are on blu-ray, but sometimes I don't really care about having everything on blu-ray. Sometimes I want that analog quality print of a movie and it has a certain charm about it. Witchboard is kind of like that to. It's charming, even though in some spots here and there, it feels like it's trying to hard even though you know it's a cheesy haunting flick anyway. Don't talk to David now.  

1 comment:

  1. To answer your question on throwing a hatchet at work. If you hit the person and cause an injury.. that would be horseplay, however, if you miss then that would be a soft error.

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