Cemetery Gates

Cemetery Gates was a buy one, get one free dvd I received at Disc Replay. My expectations were pretty damn low to be honest. I know, I know-don't judge a book by it's cover. But, it just didn't look like it was even in the realm of "so good, it's bad". The box art, the screen shots on the back and just the whole presentation of it when I picked it up reeked of "well, this is going to be one my top five worst of the year." Man, was I wrong. I was dead fucking wrong. I loved this damn movie. The gore and body count alone is worth the price of admission. Even though for me, that price was free. Now that I know what this film is and what it's all about, I can safely say that if you find a copy of this in the wild for about 5, 10 or even 15 bucks... just grab that shit. It's one gore-fested ride.

 No, this has nothing to do with the Pantera song.

Science=Murder? What about Graffiti=Vandalism?

Bald guys with pony tails really bother me.

All this blonde chick thinks about is swallowing dick. I approve.

You know you're in a great area when the road signs have shotgun blast holes in it.

That's some dark, messy grave son.

Chocolate raisin cake? What the hell?

 The worst teeth I've ever seen.

"I used to smoke the reefer too. Makes your balls shrivel up and fall off-they don't tell you that when they sell you the shit!"

Did we really have to see that mutated animal-thing take a dump?

That purple monster/cartoon bit was hilarious!

Damn, August has some nice breasts!

 The scene where one of the side characters is high as a kite and sees that Tasmanian devil come out of the bushes as a bright purple, grimace looking cartoon character is worth sitting through the whole film on it's own. But there's so much more than that. The hot chicks, gore (lot's of it) that pony tail guy from Phantasm and lot's of other reasons make this a must for your collection. I was just lucky and added it for free. Now go listen to some Pantera.